Disappointed

(Read Phillipians-Chapter 3)

Phil 3:12-14 NIV

Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

In his book The Life You've Always Wanted - Spiritual Disciplines for Ordinary People, John Ortberg begins the first chapter by penning the words, "I'm disappointed". With the exception of God's Word - the Bible, I do not recall a book that has spiritually bloodied and battered me as much as the first few pages of this book have. You see, I immediately connected with Ortberg's sentiment -"I'm disappointed".

I am disappointed that I am not a better husband. I am disappointed that I am not a better Father. I am disappointed that I am not a better Son, friend, pastor, counselor, and student. I am disappointed that I am not BETTER, period. What has hurt the most is the fact that I am not a better Christian. I am not what I could be and should be; falling far short of all that God has called me to be. Am I better than I once was? I think so. But, I can be better!

Far too many times in life, we fall prey to the attitude that says we're "good enough” or, “good enough because it would be too hard to be better”. This affects every aspect of our life. I am not a better husband because I allow my "self" to get in the way. I am not a better Father because being better would require shifting my focus away from myself. On and on it goes to the same end - I am my own worst enemy. Whether it's partner, parent or pastor, at the end of the day I still have more questions than answers and more struggles than strengths.

I think that is why the Apostle Paul, the self proclaimed worst of all sinners, wrote these words. In them, he says, "I am not there yet, but I am trying!" Although he learned to be content in whatever earthly situation and surrounding, he never was content in his spiritual growth in Christ. He realized the value in becoming more like Christ and, increasingly, so am I. If I become more Christ-like, I will become better in every aspect of my life.

For years I have used the old pyramid diagram when counseling couples. If a husband and wife each form one of the bottom corners of the pyramid and God is represented by the point at the top; as each person comes closer to God they automatically come closer to each other. My point is this. I am not as close to God as I can be, so I am obviously not as close to Robin as I could be. My prayer is that I will always be disappointed.

Are you disappointed?

Wiser Words...

I was reading someones blog today and was reminded of the apostle Paul's words in Philippians 1:21 (NIV), which reads "For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain." As I meditated on those words, the meaning began to resonate in my mind and spirit. I've been holding on to so many things, being a lover of many things in this world. Not necessarily bad things, but things which take my focus away from Christ.

Thinking back over the last few years, I must admit that I haven't always felt very happy and certainly not content. Might this be a part of the transforming process that isn't intended to make me happy, but instead, make me holy.

As much as I love my wife, my kids, my church and calling, I am beginning to be able to say with Paul - "I want to go home."

What are you living for?

Stepping It Up!

I took a step of faith today. I have been praying and sensing the Holy Spirit's leading to expand the marriage ministry to which God has called us. After a month of prayer, I finally sent out our new brochure offering to minister to marriages in any church.

A member at one church which recently asked us to come and do a conference wanted to know how much we "charged" to speak at a conference. I looked at Robin, Robin looked at me, we both blinked and, simultaneously, our minds shifted into neutral. Uhhh...

I was the first to speak ( I hate it when I do that) How about $100.00 for a weekend? Robin looked at me like I was nuts. She was right, I am nuts. $100.00 was way to much. Robin and I have been called by God to minister to those marriages that are falling through the cracks due to job losses and the subsequent loss of insurance coverage which makes many of the good ministries currently available, cost prohibitive.

We decided, right then and there, we would continue ministering to all couples and let God take care of the rest. We have never set a fee for counseling, mentoring, speaking or writing (95% free-of-charge)and God has been more than faithful.

I do not know what type of responses I will receive from the churches, if any; but God will continue to draw hurting people and couples to us so that we may be faithful and obedient to his call.

Green and Purple? Those Colors Do Not Match!

I printed 100 wedding invitations with matching envelopes today. When I looked at the order and figured the formulas to mix the inks, I realized that I would end up with a "booger" green and a dirty purple. Yeah, those are the colors I envision when I think of a wedding - NOT!

I printed the green first - a floral pattern. It looked OK. But a purple text overprint? I had my doubts. I mixed the purple without as much black base as the formula called for and inked-up the press.

Guess what? The dark purple accented the green and the invitation really popped! I got to thinking. That is similar to what Christ does for us. Without him, we are plain, often doubted by our self and others and ugly in our sins. He covers us with his royalty, completes us and through him, the color of our life can pop!

I can relate to "booger green". I was once ugly inside; however, through Christ, my life has meaning and purpose. As long as those invitations stay in one piece - with the green alongside the purple, they will remain beautiful. In the same way if you and I stay at the side of Christ, our lives will be testimonies of his power and grace. Now, that's a match!

How has Christ brightened the color of your life? I would love to read your comments!

Words Whisper - Actions Scream

If we claim to have fellowship with him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth. 1 John 1:66 NIV

I saw a snippet of a television program today. In one segment a woman called in asking for advice for a situation dealing with a topic that would be better suited to my other blog. However, she was professing her faith and religious belief all-the-while betraying that faith by her actions.

Sadly, that has become commonplace in so many "Christian" circles. Do not get me wrong, I do not know where this woman is with Christ and I am not one to place a list of demands on any believer. But there does come a time when the words we speak should, at least, resemble our actions and the way we live.

Incongruities in our words and actions bring devastating results. Failing to "live out" our words lays waste to everything we say because, over time, it becomes clear that there is little to no honesty in our words. We can fool people for a while, maybe even a long while. But we will never fool God.

Jesus, quoting Isaiah, said this, "He replied, "Isaiah was right when he prophesied about you hypocrites; as it is written:
"These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me . They worship me in vain; their teachings are but rules taught by men.' You have let go of the commands of God and are holding on to the traditions of men."
(Mark 7:6-8 NIV)

This is every believer's daily battle. It takes daily prayer, effort and determination to win this battle. So, are you whispering or screaming?

GameDay - Ohio Men's Ministries Convention

Checking out for a couple of days. Be Blessed!

Are You Ministering in Your Gift?

Last night, I payed an unexpected visit to one of our Children's Ministries classes. What I observed thrilled me. I saw smiles, excitment and participation that most teachers/leaders would be thrilled to have in their classes.

Why was this class so dynamic? For one thing, the leader in that class was actively engaging the kids. The kid's were learning not and, but, because they were having fun. The teacher knew the material and went beyond the curriculum to exlain the topic and bring it to each child's world.

That teacher has the gift of teaching, especially for children's ministry. That is why serving within one's gifting is so important! When we fail to serve, God's kingdom is not advanced according to his will. When we fail to serve, using the gifts and abilities God has given us, God's kingdom isn't advanced in full force with amazing results following. These kids do not want to miss, and have not missed, a class since we started this ministry. They beg their parents to take them!

That's why we are so prayerful and careful about ministry leadership. The right combination of ministry and leadership creates the avenues for the Holy Spirit's working in people's lives.

YOU have spiritual gifts! You have talents and abilities that God has given you! Are you using them?

Excited? Don't Forget To Pray!

Wow! Yesterday was an amazing day. I am excited when people accept Christ! I am excited when people come back to Christ! I am excited about people getting excited about Christ and His church! I am excited about the wave of fresh new ministry volunteers and their ideas, that have been coming across my desk. Did, I mention that I am excited?

Among the excitement; however, there has to be order. Do I like these ministry ideas? I love them! From the start, the leadership at Grace Fellowship has followed three primary rules in regard to church ministries.

1. Ministry must be maintainable - We watch for and, often, wait for a person(s) with a desire for a particular ministry to come forward. God places these desires on their heart and when he calls someone he also empowers that person(s) for that ministry. If we get ahead of God and place someone in a ministry, just to fill a need, that particular person my become discouraged and tired very quickly and that ministry's success will be vulnerable. All the persons involved in a ministry must be on the same page - there is an energy that is created when God's people are in unity and God blesses that!
2. Ministry must be Sustainable - Once we start a ministry at Grace Fellowship, it is our intent for that ministry to be ongoing - meeting felt needs and connecting people with God and each other. We desire for every ministry at Grace Fellowship to have the resources required for long term success.
3. Ministry should be done with Excellence - From idea, burden or vision to ongoing success, ministry efforts need to be bathed in prayer. Prayerful and careful consideration and planning are critical to all seasons of a ministry - especially ministry leadership. At Grace Fellowship, we wait on the Holy Spirit's leading and when he leads - we move. As we follow his leading, we will never be early and we will never be late, because God's timing is perfect.

We are in a season of growth, spiritually and numerically. Now, more than ever, we need to pray and seek the Spirit's direction. As he leads, we will move. Someone once said that the church moves forward on it's knees. The pace may seem slow, but the importance of our message and our mission requires that we follow and then lead at the Spirit's pace.

Pray with us!

Guess What I Get To Do Tomorrow?

Teach the Word and Love The People!
I love It!

Important or Urgent

I had breakfast this morning with a great Christian brother. It was so refreshing to step away from the busyness of life and just relax, eat and talk. We talked about plans, dreams, desires, current realities and our hope for the future.

After a while our conversation turned into a intriguing discussion about Biblical prophecy and the recent prophecy/warning issued by David Wilkerson . This discussion brought me to a few questions. In light of current events and, discerning the time in which we live, has my focus been on the important rather than the urgent? Have I been so caught up in the "How" that I have allowed it to overshadow the "Why" of kingdom advancement?

Sure, I still desire to be in full-time ministry and I perceive my calling to be very important; however, encouraging people to be prepared for the coming days and, ultimately, for our Lord Jesus Christ's return is urgent. I need to place the greater emphasis on reaching people rather than the capacity or role in which I reach them.

Are you focusing on the important or the urgent?

Fake IT or Take IT

Brothers, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things — and the things that are not — to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him. It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God — that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. Therefore, as it is written: "Let him who boasts boast in the Lord." 1 Corinthians 1:26-31 NIV

My family and I are nearing our first year anniversary at the place of ministry in which God has placed us for this time. Today, in a informal meeting, we were reminiscing about the past year and it's experiences. During the course of the conversation one of my most apparent weaknesses was mentioned. I call it a weakness, most would consider it a personality trait. Believe me, from the vantage point of the bearer of the trait, it can seem like a weakness.

I have blogged about this before and I am sure that I will again. Call it charisma, dynamic personality, excitability or whatever else it is called, whatever it is, I do not have it. Never did, never will!

Why?

It is simple, really. Personality is largely hard-wired from infancy - from a time during which we had little to no control of our environment. Our temperament, personality, mannerisms and, especially, the way we portray ourselves around people cannot readily be changed at the core of our being. We can adapt our actions in an attempt to fit into specific roles or situations, but over the long term such adaptation will become exhausting.

If I'm not dynamic, what am I? I am real! When I counsel an individual, lead a Bible study, teach a class, preach the Word and minister in any capacity, those watching and listening are seeing a minuscule amount of my ability and a truckload of God's power! I never want to portray anything fake or anything that misrepresents who I am. If I ever did I would be robbing God of his glory!

It's by God's power that I can even speak to one person. There was a day when speaking to even the smallest groups would have me swallowing a half bottle of antacids beforehand. God has brought me a long, long way. I receive the criticism about my lack of the dynamic as a testimony to God's grace and faithfulness. You see, in order to be criticized for something, one has to be, at least, trying to do that something. I remember when I would not have even tried.

The next time you are criticized, instead of trying to adapt and fake it, why not let God take it and just watch what he alone can do!

Got The Spirit?

2 Corinthians 3:17-18 NIV

"Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is , there is freedom. And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit. "

The past few weeks have been amazing in regard to what God is doing in his Church at Grace Fellowship. We have just surpassed the one year anniversary of Grace Fellowship's existence and we have been experiencing the moving of the Holy Spirit in our services.

I have noticed a couple of factors that have been instrumental in preparing the way and creating the avenues for the Spirit's working.

1. Prayer - There have been several men, who have been gathering around our lead pastor before the AM service and praying for the Lord's anointing to empower his messenger as he brings God's Word. There are also those who spend a great deal of time in prayer and fasting, both privately and corporately, for the church. God is honoring these things.
2. Expectation - A common statement to hear around Grace Fellowship is, "We just can't wait to see what God is going to do next." It is that expectancy that prepares hearts to be open to whatever the Holy Spirit wants to do in each person. If we expect the Holy Spirit to do something, he, most likely, will.

I have determined in my mind and heart that I am going to expect God to "show-up big" in all of our our services - children, youth and adults. Regardless of what songs we're singing, who is preaching and what the message is about. In these past weeks, I have seen God take a simple and short message and touch the hearts and lives of many.

As the verse above says, "Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom." The presence of the Holy Spirit is what draws people. That is something that can't be programed; however, it can be practiced. I am expecting great things in the weeks and months to come. As we draw closer to God and allow the Holy Spirit to work in our lives, we will see even greater things as he makes us more like Christ and his glory is revealed.

Got the Spirit?

How's Your Aim? - Our Greatest Responsibility and Ministry

Sons are a heritage from the LORD, children a reward from him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are sons born in one's youth.

Ps 127:3-4 NIV

Saturday night, we went to a friend's (yes we have friends) birthday party at a banquet hall. Being in a public facility, when the need arose, I took our son, Alex, to the restroom. As we walked, I said something silly to which he responded back with silliness far surpassing anything I could come up with.

I do not recall how the subject came up, but in between the silliness, I told him that two of my favorite things in life were being a husband to his mother and being his father. He looked at me and asked, "Even more than being a rock star?" I have no idea where that came from.

When we returned to our home that evening, I heard Alex telling my wife, Robin, what I had said. I think that he felt even more loved and secure by that simple statement made from a man who still has more questions than answers.

Yesterday, during our morning church service, we had a baby dedication. I used the above verse on the picture we projected during the dedication. As I was preparing that picture, I realized that if children are like arrows, than I, as their father, have the responsibility of aiming our children toward God and his will for their young lives. If I aim them at Christ, chances are they will become godly young men and a godly young lady. However, if I aim them at anything else...

There are three things that I want our children to always know and remember about their father. That I love God, I love their mother and that I love them! You see what I'm aiming them at? I want them to grow up and exhibit those same qualities to God, their spouse and their children.

How's your aim?

Adapted from the MONDAY MARRIAGE MINDER free e-letter. To subscribe send an email to revdkidd@gmail.com with Subscribe MMM in the subject line.

Are You Practicing The Presence?

Jesus said, "I know. I saw Satan fall, a bolt of lightning out of the sky. See what I've given you? Safe passage as you walk on snakes and scorpions, and protection from every assault of the Enemy. No one can put a hand on you. All the same, the great triumph is not in your authority over evil, but in God's authority over you and presence with you. Not what you do for God but what God does for you—that's the agenda for rejoicing." Luke 10:18-20 The Message

Have you ever felt so bogged down in church programs and strategy that you felt the joy of serving the Lord begin to wane? Planning, strategizing and organization are all good and needed; however, when these things get in the way of being in the presence of God, then we and the church suffers.

Nothing is more powerful, strengthening and provides more clarity of mind than being in the presence of God. In our human strength, we can accomplish some things - maybe even very well for a season, but a foundation built on human abilities and attributes will crumble sooner or later.

One afternoon this week, I was sitting in the office feeling frustrated over the tension between what I wanted to accomplish and what I was actually accomplishing. Finally, I left the office and went into the sanctuary and experienced the fresh presence of the Lord. I came out with a much different mind-set than I had when I went in. Even though I take the time to do this daily, sometimes daily simply is not enough.

I love how The Message says that our triumph is not in our authority, but in God's authority over us and presence with us.

OK Dave. Remember the plan. Pray More! Think Less! Remember that it is not about me and all about Jesus and people. God, may I always willingly place myself under your authority and be in your presence daily!

"Good"

"Why do you call me good ?" Jesus answered. "No one is good — except God alone."
Mark 10:18-19 NIV

Last night after church I went to the hospital to be with my mother. When I arrived at her bedside, I placed one hand on her forehead and grasped her hand with my other hand. She welcomed my cold hands on her warm forehead. I was more than willing to do whatever I could to make her more comfortable; however, what she said to me was unexpected. She opened one eye, focused it on me and told me that I had always been a good son. While I talked with her, anointed her with oil and prayed with her, I couldn't block out the memories of those times in my life when I would not have considered myself a good son. Apparently, the definition of good is highly subjective, at least, between my mother and I.

The moment was bittersweet - the words she spoke and the tone in which she spoke them, both seemed to be similar to what is depicted in the movies between a mother and son in their final moments together on earth. However, as we prayed, she was praising Jesus and thanking him for his blessings in her life.

As I sat a watched her sleep today, I wondered if, last night, I experienced a small glimpse into how God views us as his blood bought and covered children. Even with all my faults and failings, my mother still loves me and called me a good son. Why? It is because she paid a price for me by investing a large portion of her life into me and she looks at me through the lens of that price.

It's the same for God, he looks at every born again believer and sees the price he paid and the covering that he bought with the blood of his son, Jesus Christ. Even when we don't consider ourselves good, if we are faithful, we will one day hear him say, "Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!" Matt 25:21 NIV

Mom is still in need of Christ's healing touch and the prayers of his people; however, today was slightly better than yesterday for her. God is good!