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Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Much Needed Lesson In Walking By Faith

Have you ever felt like, not only did you take a step of faith to follow God's will for your life, but every step is clouded in the darkness of the unknown.

I've been struggling with that recently. When I finally answered the call to ministry, I was excited, I couldn't wait to get started. But something happened. Being in volunteer ministry has been the most rewarding, exciting, challenging and frustrating experience of my life thus far. It had been my expectation that I would somehow transition into a full-time paid position at some church. However, that hasn't happened yet and I sometimes feel like I've been led to a desert place and abandoned. I know I haven't been abandoned, but it does feel that way sometimes.

Today was our monthly sectional ministers meeting. Pastor Clay was there to lead us in a time of prayer. Wow, was that ever needed. As I listened, prayed with and was prayed for by my brothers in the ministry, God spoke some things to my heart. The first was that I needed to trust Him - he holds my future in his hands. Second, I lack confidence, I have an inferiority complex, especially around other ministers. Aside from all my faults, God showed me that he created me with characteristics that I view as weaknesses but he wants to use as strengths through his power. WOW!

Normally, I'm not an emotional person, but the tears began to flow as I poured my heart out to God. If you struggling with your self worth, if you feel inferior, know that you don't have to impress anybody. Be honest and open about how you feel and allow the Holy Spirit to minister to you!

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